awful

I had the most awful experience the other day.

Firstly, I was in the much maligned but accurately so

Palmerston North.

Many people including myself have experienced this most awful of things.

I was on a course with a few Young Farmers and

a couple of Dairy Women's Network farmers.

On the course were a couple of my favourite young woman farmers.

Awesome Manz has just left working for NZYF for greener pastures,

actually she's moved to work for Beef+LambNZ

so it will be drier pastures

cause not that many sheep and beef farmers have irrigation.

Then there was Ruth.

Ruth has recently graduated from uni.

She's energetic, enthusiastic, delightful, fun and an amazing worker and leader.

She rides hunters and milks cows.

Has so much potential for so many things.

She's stepped up into Regional leadership for NZYF

and will be a huge support for Andrew the Chair.

My awful experience was as I listened to these young women,

I felt my age as I realised that I must have sounded just like them

when I was their age.

Open, curious, intelligent.

Clear in their communication skills,

willing to ask the hard and silly questions,

safe in their assurance they are who they are.

I was like that and

then life happened and

I got smart to how to play the games.

I do like bending the rules in the games and

I know as I head into middle age

(least I think it's middle age,

I might not quite be there yet cause the baby boomers,

the generation of my parents, keep shifting the start age for middle age

proving you are only as old as you feel.

That makes me 31).

I'm glad I've learned the lessons I have,

I enjoyed tackling life and learning my lessons

now I realise that plenty of women who had gone before me

had shared a bit of their wisdom but I was too young,

too convinced of my own knowledge

to really listen.

Besides that I would never have listened to my mother.

Everyone knows your mum has no life experiences.

Have a glimpse of how you were is both awful

and wonderful.

Awful, because I recognise missed opportunities for myself

to recieve and to give advice.

Wonderful, because I can see how much I've learned and experienced and

how my life has panned out so well.

I am blessed, that's true.

Blessed to know so many great people

who add so many experiences and understadnings to my life.

I'm blessed I am willing to learn and to continue doing so.