We have the visa

and I still have hives.

I think I would miss them if they went away.

I think not, too.

 

I've come to the conclusion that

regardless of the physical 'why' I have hives,

I need to focus on the spiritual reason I have hives.

 

Sorry, had to stop and scratch my elbow just then

(at least it wasn't the bottom of my feet,

those suckers are killing me but

I have discovered that if you wear sneakers and

tie them quite tight the pressure stops the itching.

I'm thinking of wearing a skin tight PVC suit to work).

 

By spiritual reason,

I mean that I think I have these red lumps

because I need, need, need to change my life.

They are stress and diet induced.

So that means the diet has to change,

already was but now I need to be serious about it,

and the stress has to change.

 

Even though I have a career

and I have moved up the career ladder,

increasing my income and status,

at the grand age of 15,523 days old

I realise that a career is a pretty empty thing.

 

That won't stop me from finding interesting jobs to do,

it's just that I will be doing them

for different reasons.

 

I marvel at these hyper, super people who get profiled in glossy magazines

about their indy start up business which just sold for a gazillion bucks

to some rape and pillage style corporate.

Plus they have a perfect house they renovated,

subtle lighting on their lucky find kauri polished floors,

sink into white couches next to the concertina style doors 

leading to the expansive deck and

have golden children named Poppy and Henry,

who play six sports and piano each and

like to cook dinner each night as a family activity
because the hyper, super glossy indy start up person 'makes time' to be there.

And then you realise that they had to sell their business cause

they were mortgaged to the hilt,

worked every waking hour (except for dinner time and prep) and

got hives from being super stressed,

but they kept the beach house.

 

Whoops don't know where that came from.

May have been from my darker side or

the side which is in need of a deeper bath at home.

Either way I'm ahead of the game,

I've not got a mortgage anymore,

nor have I sold my indy business to a faceless corporate

(I just work for one).

 

I think I'd rather be the best person I can be

than the best employee,

or business owner.

 

Maybe a glossy magazine spread would be quite nice.

I would have to have that post-hives

so that may be a long way off.

 

P.S. My Homeboy got a two year work visa, which takes a lot of pressure off us.... at least until we apply for Residency.