This stress is the kind that governments induce.
I'm trying to be cool as we (I) apply for my homeboy's*
New Zealand Residency and renew his Work Visa.
It isn't actually masses of work but
it's just fraught with the concept there is a perfect application.
It is made stressful because we want our lives to go on how they are just now.
My homeboy's working in a job he enjoys,
with responsibilities he likes,
a team he enjoys and hours he loves.
(I'm less fond of the hours as a 6am start for him
which means an alarm at 4.30am for both of us)
The upshot of an unsuccessful application is my homeboy
goes back to Tonga quick smart and
we can apply again or appeal the decision.
Impact of an unsuccessful application is
is I loose my husband for an indefinite period of time,
our future plans go array,
and depression and frustration all round.
The stakes are high for us.
Residency takes up to nine months to be processed.
Nine months is enough time to have a baby in.
You can see why there are often slight overstayers with new borns as the reason.
The husband needs residency,
the wife is a resident or citizen,
they apply for residency and very shortly she becomes pregnant.
They wait, wait, wait and as the baby gets ready to be born,
they get declined,
probably for perfectly fine reasons,
but who is going to bail on their wife just as she is about to give birth?
Anyway we are not in that situation.
Just a regular Work Visa application followed by a Residency application.
And me feeling rather exposed as we filter through our relationship
providing proof that we are in a stable and genuine relationship.
Think about that =
How do you prove (or disprove) if you are in a stable and genuine relationship with someone?
Let me tell you,
when you have to prove something like that,
something that really isn't documented,
it is hard to prove.
We know, our family knows,our friends know,
but how do you tell the government that?
marriage certificates and leases,
power bills and joint bank accounts,
romantic cards and love notes,
photos and whatever you can find that has a date and both your names on it
is all you can provide.
It's not easy having my nice white, middle class bubble burst.
*formerly my fulla but he is not of the British background so doesn't know how to pronouce